the diving bell and the butterfly

the first exposure to this film was by way of a flier
closely followed by an expose of the director in the smh
and then finally a viewing of the trailer at another film viewing
everything pointed to this being one very special film
and the big thing in it's favour - le scaphandre et le papillon
it's french though the director is american julian schnabel
he apparantly wanted authenticity and insisted on keeping it in french
which i find totally admirable as translation i think can mean degrading
this is a true story based on an autobiography by a stroke victim
jean-dominique bauby is a 43 year-old successful magazine editor
he suffers a totally unexpected stroke leading to locked-in syndrome
meaning he has lost all movement of his body but his brain is fully alert
this he describes as the feeling of being locked in a diving bell
while his mind is free to wander like a butterfly
the film opens with him coming out of a coma after the stroke
but we see things from his view - behind his one eye that can blink
nurses and doctors come and go including one armed with needle and thread
who proceeds to stitch up his other infected eye with us behind it
truely one of the most skin-crawling film scenes i have witnessed
which also has the effect of locking us right in with bauby
and from there it's a roller-coaster ride of his emotions
luckily he actually possesses a wicked sense of humour
so there are some hilarious moments as we hear what he is thinking
but cannot relay his thoughts to various visitors and medical staff
there's a middle part of the film showing his life pre-stroke
including a journey to the country to spend time with his estranged children
and then showing him suffering the stroke while driving with his son
his gorgeous ex-wife still loves the man and is a constant visitor
takes a call from his lover and has to relay to her his feelings
that is that he waits every day for her to visit him
which i thought was almost unbearably cruel on his part
the film takes us through his effort to write his memoirs
blink by blink, letter by letter, word by word
and then he tragically dies a few days after publication
i walked out of the theatre with nothing else on my mind
including the location of my wallet and phone
which i discovered missing when paying for my meal
uh-oh back to the theatre and waved in to search the floor
just as the film was re-starting for the next session
thought i would sit down for a bit while the eyes adjusted
90 minutes later i walked out again armed with wallet and phone
and this time feeling much more content about his actions
for if you cannot express your true feelings on your death-bed
then what hope do we have of honesty any other time
just the most amazing film
see it - twice